I guess you could say this painting has been in the works ever since I started painting. I knew someday I would paint the Savior. He is the subject I feel most deeply about, and so my heart yearned to paint Him. However, I always put His portrait in the "someday" category, as I felt I wasn't good enough "this day" to do it. Then it occurred to me "one day" that if I always put Him in the "someday" that day would probably never come. So I gave myself permission to mess up, to not be perfect, and to just try. I knew this wasn't going to be my one and only portrait of Christ, and so I could give myself a starting point, a place to grow from.
I did a lot of research in connection with this painting. I must have looked at hundreds of paintings of Christ. I'd look at portrait after portrait and say, "Nope. That's not what Christ looks like to me. This one looks too old. This one is too serious. This one is too weak." And suddenly, the task at hand overwhelmed me. What was I thinking? Who did I think I was trying to capture the likeness of the Savior?
So I wrote one of my professors from college to get advice, had he ever painted the Savior? Any tips? He told me he hadn't ever painted the Savior, and never intended to, why try to paint someone when we have no idea what he looks like? Especially when there were plenty of other good artists that had created His image already. I was really starting to question my painting at this point.
Then I sat down with another book of images of Christ, and was wondering what to do, when I had this thought: "Jenedy, what does it matter if they look exactly like Christ?" And suddenly I had this revelation, I wasn't creating this painting just so I could share with the world what I thought Christ looked like. And all this images of Christ from Bloch, Anderson, Caravaggio, they weren't painting Christ to share with the world what Christ looked like. They painted Him as a symbol of charity, love, faith, and hope. They painted Christ because of what He stood for, and what He did, not just so we could see Him. And when people put pictures of Christ on their walls, it wasn't to show their friends what Christ looked like, it was a reminder of who Christ was and their relationship to Him. It was a reminder that Christ lived, and that He still lives, and that He is aware of each and every one of us.
Suddenly I felt free to return to my easel, as the weight of creating a perfect likeness of Christ fell from off of my shoulders. I went to work, and did the best I could, hoping that someone out there would feel something when they looked at my painting. I hoped they would feel Christ's love for them and sense His reality, without expecting an exact portrait.
This painting is a precious one to me, although it is just a starting point. It's relatively simple in composition, but there is more to it than just a head and shoulders. If you look closely, you'll notice that the cloak over His head is really textured, and kind of rough. This was done in contrast to the beautiful smooth white robe. This is meant to be a symbol of the Savior, a God, coming down to earth, and taking upon Himself mortality, and with it the sins of the whole world. How thankful I am for His humility in setting aside His majesty to come to be with the least of us, and making it possible for us to one day put on those beautiful white robes ourselves.
How much I love Him. This is my witness of Him.
12" x 24" oil on cradled panel
10 comments:
It's beautiful Jen. I love how young he looks. I feel more like we can relate. He actually looks ALOT like one of my friends from college. haha.
It is a beautiful painting. I believe he would have amazing eyes just like your portrait.
I love the portrait, but even more I love the post. Thank you for sharing not just your art, but also your processes, your challenges, your goals, your triumphs. Your blog is always an inspiring one.
Hi,
the painting is beautiful. And thank you for sharing your thoughts and feelings about this painting because a while ago i also was dealing with thoughts wheter or not i should make a painting of Christ ( i felt i wasn't good enough to do that and how could i if nobody knows what he looked like... etc ) But finally i did make a watercolor painting of Christ just to show my love for Him :)
Take care and God bless you.
greetings Sliekje and cats
Wow Jen, love this portrait and your recent work. Still love reading how they came about in your creative mind an onto canvas. Your work is very inspiring as always. Take care and God Bless.
Your friend always
rae
Good for you Jenedy! I think it turned out great. It is a daunting task to paint the Savior--one that I have never dared attempt. Your work is so beautiful!
Beautiful. I love his eyes.
Beautifully done. I love the look in his eyes. When you look into them they seem to say, "I see you, I notice you". Your works are amazing Jen.
I am starting my first portrait of the Savior today. Crystal has helped me with the photo reference taken awhile ago. I've painted Him several times now in slightly illustrative multi-figure paintings. Each time, I have felt the same as what you've eloquently described here, that His painted image is a symbol to move the mind to His reality, to touch the heart with a sense of His love and perfect attributes. And I am grateful we are not only allowed, but encouraged by Church leaders to do this. If you ever want an interesting read, get a copy of BYU Studies, Vol. 39, No. 3 (2000). It's all about the struggles and concepts and philosophies accompanying the desire to paint the Savior.
Someday explains it really well. You have painted a beautiful portrait of our Savior. I figure there is one in my future as well. Needless to say, I'm nervous. And James, I'll have to read that BYU study as well. Thanks Jenedy!
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